Flat Tires and Family

 

    This week I traveled to Utah to celebrate my friends K and D’s wedding, only fate was a wee bit against us. Halfway between home and Utah, T and I heard a loud scraping noise. I jumped out of the car, and my heart sank. Our tires were dead. T immediately started cursing and worrying about paying for new tires and calling roadside services, just as I immediately started worrying about T’s mood and staying calm. Isn't it interesting how differently the two of us responded to the same citation? My number one priority was T, and his number one priority was our safety. From flat tires to whatever else the family brings to the table, men and women have separate priorities and reactions to any citation. Isn't it fascinating to think about the ways we are different and how that difference makes us stronger together? 

    I want to start by saying this post will focus on the positives of Straight Heterosexual families. I am a loving ally to the LGBTQ+ community, but this week's post will be focusing on heterosexual couples and their strengths. Know that I love you, even though this post is not for you.  

    My research led to some very interesting articles and documentaries this week. Did you know that some feminists promote the idea that the only difference between men and women is the set of X and Y chromosomes? They believe that the only reason we act differently is due to the way we have been raised. They fear that anyone promoting the idea of men and women being different genetically will encourage certain workplaces to discriminate against hiring women. I disagree strongly with this line of thought. Science can prove that we are different due to both nature and nurture, and rather than denying our differences, they should be celebrated.  

    From the day we are born, boys and girls act differently. Female babies want to focus on faces and expressions, whereas baby boys are more likely to watch motion and action within hours out of the womb. This pattern continues as we get older. Girls prefer playing with dolls and telling stories, and boys usually prefer toy guns and trucks. Differences will continue to form as we grow older. Women will naturally be more creative and cooperative with others. Women will be better at soothing others, and relationship orientation, whereas men are more likely to take things literally, act more aggressively, and have far better special orientation than most women.  

    As I learned more about the common differences between men and women, I couldn't help but think about the things that drive me crazy about T and how they make a little more sense now. Every time our Bishop assigns us a talk, T asks me to fill up as much time as possible. I love public speaking and find it so confusing that he doesn't, but that's rather standard for females! While dealing with our tires, T and I were able to see the ways we are different rather clearly, but those differences make us stronger. As a mechanic quickly worked on our car, T was anxious as I kept holding his hand, hugging him, and making jokes. Not every citation will look like this, but it's what we needed. Between his taking care of us practically, by calling roadside services, choosing what location to buy our new tires from, and planning out how to pay for the tires. To my taking pictures and taking care of T mentally, we were able to go from roadside disaster to back up and running in no time. Laughing and smiling the rest of the way to Utah. T and I are very different; those differences drive me crazy, but those differences are also the reasons why I love him and why we work. I am so thankful for him and for all the wonderful and amazing ways we are different.  

(This week's Photo needs no caption, but regardless, here is a photo of the now-famous flat tire.)